i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Why is there bacon in the couch?
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
