i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize