I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
The air was thick with penises
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
