Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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