# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
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