dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I wish i was in the wii world.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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