There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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