Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
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