Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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