So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Dignity is for republicans.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Dear god my vagina.
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