My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
