I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
