His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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