"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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