using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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