All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
