We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize
