I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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