Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
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