Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
