We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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