There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
We need to rekindle our bromance
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
