I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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