if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize