I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
