My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Randomize