the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
