Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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