didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
