My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
