Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
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