There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
