He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
