It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
