WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Randomize
