that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
she pinky promised me she was 18
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
