Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
i think my mom watched the whole time
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Randomize