addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Randomize
