worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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