the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
