He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
