Texts From Last Night · Miss_Wonton's Favorites

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Miss_Wonton's Favorites Texts:

Sort By: Date Favorited / Date Posted / Good Night / Bad Night

ADVERTISEMENT

(914): View more from New York

You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?

(216): View more from Ohio

We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.

Fav 1 1010 564
share tweet
(570): View more from Pennsylvania

Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.

Fav 1 1218 586
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(425): View more from Washington

Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people

Fav 8 1156 796
share tweet
(+33): View more from France

If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.

Fav 6 2577 780
share tweet
(706): View more from Georgia

URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?

Fav 17 2045 694
share tweet
(318): View more from Louisiana

A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"

Fav 5 2016 763
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(423): View more from Tennessee

hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.

Fav 5 2088 748
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(502): View more from Kentucky

I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.

(502): View more from Kentucky

Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.

Fav 11 2345 735
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT