Texts From Last Night · marytylermoore's Favorites

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marytylermoore's Favorites Texts:

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(219): View more from Indiana

My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious

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(786): View more from Florida

i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"

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(707): View more from California

She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.

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(503): View more from Oregon

I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world

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(716): View more from New York

its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose

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(301): View more from Maryland

It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form

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(516): View more from New York

Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.

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(630): View more from Illinois

I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.

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