Texts From Last Night · pirategirl13's Favorites

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pirategirl13's Favorites Texts:

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(734): View more from Michigan

She's 90% sass and 10% boobs

Fav 4 611 336
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(712): View more from Iowa

Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ

Fav 8 773 776
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(270): View more from Kentucky

The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life

Fav 5 820 471
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(661): View more from California

I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.

Fav 1 883 398
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(248): View more from Michigan

I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.

(810): View more from Michigan

We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.

Fav 0 795 664
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(915): View more from Texas

You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"

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(216): View more from Ohio

The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.

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(214): View more from Texas

You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.

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