Texts From Last Night · wtfcarlyalyssa's Favorites

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wtfcarlyalyssa's Favorites Texts:

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.

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(706): View more from Georgia

he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline

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(406): View more from Montana

I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"

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(239): View more from Florida

In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.

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(618): View more from Illinois

was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?

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(812): View more from Indiana

We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".

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(618): View more from Illinois

My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.

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