I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
