Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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