Texts From Last Night · aligeee's Favorites

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aligeee's Favorites Texts:

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(319): View more from Iowa

Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable

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(801): View more from Utah

When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?

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(831): View more from California

YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.

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(254): View more from Texas

Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.

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(540): View more from Virginia

Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.

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(613): View more from Ontario

I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.

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(909): View more from California

I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.

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(107): View more from

That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.

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