Texts From Last Night · drunknightsxo's Favorites

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drunknightsxo's Favorites Texts:

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(907): View more from Alaska

This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.

Fav 9 1101 987
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(615): View more from Tennessee

When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?

Fav 17 3002 1029
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(423): View more from Tennessee

I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.

Fav 2 771 581
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(317): View more from Indiana

Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?

Fav 13 548 1062
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(614): View more from Ohio

I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.

Fav 8 946 661
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(727): View more from Florida

I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.

Fav 2 797 705
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(859): View more from Kentucky

Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.

Fav 2 890 557
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(940): View more from Texas

...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.

Fav 8 2649 824
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