Texts From Last Night · melissamoly's Favorites

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melissamoly's Favorites Texts:

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(805): View more from California

The air was thick with penises

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(905): View more from Ontario

His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.

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(440): View more from Ohio

He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.

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(450): View more from Quebec

She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...

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(516): View more from New York

i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.

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(859): View more from Kentucky

I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.

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(307): View more from Wyoming

Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.

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(256): View more from Alabama

Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?

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