Texts From Last Night · ShaggyMoFo's Favorites

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ShaggyMoFo's Favorites Texts:

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(989): View more from Michigan

I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.

(1-651): View more from Minnesota

It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?

Fav 9 1759 1109
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